bbbddssmm: The Chair

The Chair

There’s certain things. I like certain things. I’m not supposed to, but I do. I like to pretend I’m a little girl. And there’s other things I like to pretend too, about men and about them wanting me in a way that’s wrong. Everybody says it’s wrong. But I like it.

My boyfriend knows the way I like to play at being a little girl. So he bought me a T-shirt that says kittie on it. And he watches me from his car, waiting until I’m done with Sometimes he follows me home. I see him other times too. Watching.

Tonight, he’s watching my window. And every time I look, he’s still there. The night is all black with sound. The walls breathe, whispering and whispering. And I’m scared about the devil, how he slips like water into your dreams and drips, one drop at a time between your legs.

But tonight it’s not the devil. Tonight, my boyfriend’s watching.

I open the window. I climb out the window like I’m still living with mom and dad and sneaking out at night, like I’m being a bad girl. My boy friend touches me in those places that I like. Those certain places.

Tonight I let him take me to his car. I never did that before. His arms are strong and warm. And he drives me while he touches me where I like to be touched. And he says, unzip my pants, and I do. And he says, take it out, and I do that too. And he drives and makes me lie across the seat and he pushes my head down hard. And he makes me hold it in my mouth and I struggle, but he holds my hair tight, telling me what he’s going to do to me when he gets me to his house. I can feel how my panties are getting wet, because I’m drip dripping, one drop at a time between my legs.

If you’re good, he says, I’ll buy you a kitty.

He makes me sit in a chair in his basement. I want to be good. I do whatever he says.

Such pink little nipples, he says, pulling up my shirt. I like your nipples. He smiles.

I’m so glad I can make him happy.

You’re my little toy, he says. I’m going to package you up. Make you ready to buy. Won’t you like that?

I stare between his legs. It’s out again. He keeps touching it and it gets bigger and bigger. I nod my head. And he uses those plastic ties. The ones at the stores that hold things together. And he makes them too tight on my wrists and knees. And then I can’t move at all. And he puts them on all my fingers too. And then he touches me again. He touches me all over in places he’s never touched me before. And he rubs his penis against my face. He pushes it into my ears and my nose. He makes me have it in my mouth again. And I tell him I want to go home. I start to cry because that’s the game we play. He grabs my head and pushes himself deep in my throat until I gag and I cry and cry.

You want to be good, don’t you, he says.

He’s kept me for days now. He’s dressed me in school clothes that little girls wear. He keeps me tied up all the time, and I never stop being wet between my legs.

He brings in another girl that’s tied up too, but in a funny way kind of upside down.

Do you like my chair? He says to me.

I nod my head. I know he wants me to.

Do you want to be a chair?

I pretend I’m scared.

And he makes me do all the naughty things, all the things the devil makes you do if he’s drip, drip, dripping into your dreams. He wipes stuff on my mouth that he got from between the chair-girl’s legs. He makes me put my mouth there too and lick her and wipe my face all around. He ties me onto her and does things to my nipples and to that wet place between my legs.

Then he makes me his chair. And he sits on me so that his penis goes into me. And he reads the newspaper when he sits on me. And he eats dinner and his penis is in me and he moves in special ways.

He still has the other girl too. Sometimes he hooks us together with a tube and makes her breathe into my. . .pussy. That’s what he calls it.

Kitty, kitty, he says when he touches me. You like kitties don’t you?

And I nod, but he has my mouth all filled and a hood on my head.

And sometimes the nights are black with sound. The room breathes. The ropes squeeze my nipples. And I don’t like it, but I do. And sometimes, sometimes voices whisper.

The devil slips like water into your dreams and drips, one drop at a time between your legs. And you have to be careful. That’s what the Preacher says to me. That’s who my boyfriend is. He’s the preacher from my church where I learned about the devil. You have to be careful, he says when he sits on me and has his penis in me.

If you’re not careful, when you wake up in the morning, the angels will have brought you a baby.